Deceitful Choices Read online

  Deceitful Choices

  By C.A. Harms

  Deceitful Choices

  Copyright © 2016 by C.A. Harms.

  All rights reserved.

  First Print Edition: August 2016

  Limitless Publishing, LLC

  Kailua, HI 96734

  www.limitlesspublishing.com

  Formatting: Limitless Publishing

  ISBN-13: 978-1-68058-756-2

  ISBN-10: 1-68058-756-0

  No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to locales, events, business establishments, or actual persons—living or dead—is entirely coincidental.

  Dedication:

  Be true to yourself, and others.

  Don’t be someone you’re not, be who you are and love yourself.

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Epilogue

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  Prologue

  Lindsay

  Late October

  We all have those moments that make us realize just how careless we’ve been. Those moments when we wish we could go back and change the way we acted, or the things we said. Reroute our path and make it better—better choices, better outcomes.

  If only we could take one small lie that escalated to heights beyond repair and be truthful.

  Lies—to some they were just words spoken, but to others, they were so much more. A turning point in a relationship or friendship that finalized its future.

  Some lies you just can’t come back from. The damage is too deep.

  The ones I told recently were destructive. They could have destroyed a good man had the right people found out.

  Even though I tried to fix it, tried to explain, it was hopeless. The damage was done and I found myself alone.

  Picking up the pieces of my own deceit and learning from those mistakes.

  One lie changed my life. It woke me to the reality that just a few words could forever change someone’s life.

  I spent my adolescent years believing I wasn’t enough. My parents were never supportive; on most days I felt as if they couldn’t wait until the day I moved out and moved on. I’d heard a few times how my father didn’t even want children, and that my mother had trapped him.

  He was a selfish man and in turn, my mother became selfish too.

  I’d have been better off if they’d given me up for adoption. I never understood why they didn’t.

  My father was heavy into gambling and my mother was oblivious, or she pretended to be. As long as she was able to have her weekly manicure and a bottle of vodka, she was set. Being drunk was her vice; she didn’t have to deal with reality if she was passed out.

  They were the ones who taught me one lie could get you out of almost anything, if you told it correctly.

  But they couldn’t have been more wrong.

  Chapter 1

  Six Weeks Earlier

  “Are you okay?” Taylor asked as she stepped up to my side.

  I stood in the doorway of the beach house, staring out at the waves as they crashed against the shore before retracting back out to sea. It was a scene anyone could get lost in for hours.

  “Yeah, I’m good,” I told her.

  I had never set foot outside of our small town of Roanoke, Illinois. I lived a somewhat sheltered life compared to my friends. It was the downfall of coming from a low income family, if that was what you wanted to call what I had at home.

  Family.

  Yet this was my chance to see something new, something I may never get the chance to see again.

  Taylor, me, and couple of other girls from school took a little road trip. We were invited by Sierra, another senior Taylor knew, to stay at her family beach house in Gulf Shores, Alabama—a 3400 square foot home, to be exact. It was gorgeous and private, and I had never seen anything like it before. It made the small trailer I lived in my entire life feel like a shoe box.

  It was beautiful—the water, the air around us, everything about it. It was kind of like living the life of someone else for a few days.

  I loved the feeling. Being able to leave who I was behind and fantasize about a better life; even if it couldn’t last forever, I would treasure it for now.

  “Why do you look like you’re so far away then?” she asked, bumping her shoulder against mine as she laughed. “You do know that to enjoy this trip, you’ll have to actually step outside, right?”

  “Yes,” I sighed. “I’m just enjoying the peace for a few minutes. I never get this at home.”

  My days and nights were normally filled with my parents’ loud obnoxious behavior, their friends coming in and out at all times, my father yelling about bills being due and money he lost to his bookie, and the X-rated displays they were never private about.

  I slept most nights with my earbuds in my ears to drown out their otherwise obscene behavior. Neither of them had any morals.

  The group of kids we met up with consisted of twelve others, both girls and guys, ranging from older teenagers to younger adults. We all went in together to pay for the food and drinks for the week, but the house was supplied by Sierra’s parents.

  The money I spent should’ve been given to my parents to help pay our rent. I worked at a local restaurant busing tables, and gave Mom and Dad every last dime I made. If my father didn’t gamble away his weekly paycheck, I wouldn’t have to work to help with bills.

  I was seventeen years old, just a few months shy of eighteen. I shouldn’t be forced to work to pay my father’s debt. I should’ve been allowed to be a kid. Most teens my age were working to save for college, or buy a car, but not me. Those were luxuries I couldn’t have.

  So when the chance to escape was presented, I took it. I’d suffer the consequences later. I deserved this time away. It was a trip that would forever change my life.

  I knew when I returned home, things wouldn’t be easy. My parents would surely be pissed, but it wouldn’t be the first time.

  I would have to deal with that when the time came. It was a vicious cycle, and I vowed one day I would break free from the both of them.

  I just wanted to be someone else for a short time. Be a kid and make my own mistakes, because at home I was always fixing my parents’ mistakes. I was tired of being the person I was; I wanted to feel free.

  I needed to be free.

  Then I would return and go back to the life my parents insisted I live, until I graduated and was able to break free from their hold.

 
“Let’s go down to the beach. I heard there are a group of good-looking guys staying three houses down.” Taylor wagged her eyebrows, a huge smile creeping up and spreading across her lips. “Let’s go check it out.”

  Taylor had been my best friend since kindergarten. She was amazing, and so caring. She came from money, yet that money had not changed her or her family; they were so humble. She never once judged me based on the clothes I wore or the things I didn’t have. That was rare, because kids can be so cruel to those less fortunate.

  Instead, she loved me for the girl I was, the girl she knew hid within me. Taylor always had a way of making my life better, even though it was anything but.

  She linked her arm with mine and we walked down the path toward the rippling waves. You could hear laughter and people talking the closer we got.

  The first group to come into view was led by a girl neither Taylor, nor I, cared much for. Haven Rhoades, Miss Perfect, or so she thought. She did anything and everything she could to outdo me. She didn’t feel I belonged in her high-class world. She was older by almost two years, yet she always ran around with girls my age. I was sure it was because all the girls her own age knew how big of a bitch she was.

  Her father was a surgeon and she lived in some big fancy house on a hill. She had the nicest clothes, the most expensive car, and her attitude was awful.

  At least to me it was.

  She disliked me because of her ex, Corbin Richards. I didn’t even like him, but he showed interest in me one day. Since then I had been enemy number one. The thing was, she didn’t take the time to learn who I was, so she never truly knew me.

  She was so catty.

  So when the guy she currently had her claws in noticed me, imagine the daggers she shot my way.

  He wasn’t with our group, but of course he gained the attention of all the girls. His looks were unlike the high school guys I was used to. He was masculine, cocky, and oh, that smile of his—he knew the effects it had, considering the way he was flashing it around.

  Taylor placed her finger under my jaw and pressed upward, giggling when I turned to face her. “I think I heard you panting, and a tiny drop of drool was about to escape,” she teased, even though she attempted to hold a straight face.

  I swatted her hand away and she broke out in laughter.

  “Stop it,” I whispered.

  Hooking her arm through mine, she pulled me along toward the beach. A handsome stranger’s gaze was locked with mine as we passed. I took a chance and flashed my own smile, trying to ignore the shy feeling I had. When he winked at me, I stumbled a little and tucked my chin to hide my embarrassment.

  Taylor witnessed my inability to walk straight, and I could have tackled her to the ground when she broke out in laughter. I could just imagine the attention her outburst caused.

  For the next three hours, the handsome stranger and I eyed one another from across the beach. We silently flirted with looks alone, and for once I felt pretty and attractive. He gave me that.

  Haven moved on to flirting with another guy, apparently feeling offended by the stranger’s reaction to me.

  Her high-pitched cackle echoed along the beach; it seemed to get louder as she continued to drink. In my opinion, she resembled a hyena. It was truly horrifying.

  The afternoon sun heated my cheeks as I lounged back against the chair. I closed my eyes behind my sunglasses to further block out the light, relaxing with the cool breeze from the ocean. I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt so relaxed.

  A shadow cast over me, and I peeked through squinted eyes beneath my shades. I hated to imagine the look of shock on my face when his came into view.

  Taylor and I had asked around and found the stranger’s name was Zack. He was a twenty-one-year-old Navy SEAL, here on leave with three fellow SEALs. They were renting the house just three down from us.

  He had no idea he was surrounded by a group of high school girls, but with the thrill of older guys enjoying our company, we’d decided to keep that small detail tucked away tightly. Haven was so occupied with her own drunk behavior, she was off doing god knows what with god knows who. She wasn’t here to spoil our fun.

  “Ladies,” he stated as he nodded at both Taylor and me. “Do you mind if I join you?”

  I was momentarily awestruck, but made a quick recovery and sat up straighter. Tilting my sunglasses down just enough to scan over his broad chest and tight abs, I spotted the corner of his lip lifting in a smirk. He had definitely caught me ogling him. The guy took care of himself; there was no doubt.

  When our gaze once again connected, he arched a brow and smiled.

  I was sunk with just that grin alone. My throat felt dry, my chest felt weak and the sunlight no longer was the reason my body felt hot. I then realized I had yet to respond to his question.

  “Sure,” I said. My response came out in more of a whisper than a confident reply; it wasn’t what I was shooting for.

  Epic fail on my part.

  He took the empty chair next to mine and held out his hand. “My name’s Zack.”

  “We know your name; I’m pretty sure every girl on this beach knows by now.” I placed my hand in his trying to regain my confidence and he gave it a gentle shake. Releasing took a little longer, as if he was memorizing the contours of my palm then my fingers. Chills ran up my arm, heat rose in my neck, and I fought the shiver that consumed me. It felt like the temperature had just gone up ten degrees.

  “Hi,” Taylor said as she leaned in toward him, practically lying across my lap. She gave me a knowing glance and widened her eyes. “I’m Lindsay’s best friend, Taylor.”

  Zack’s eyes settled on mine once more and he smiled. “Nice to meet you both.” If I hadn’t already been a mess of goo on the inside from just his presence alone, he had just finished me off. That damn confident grin of his was a weapon, and he knew it. He used it well and I was pretty sure I had just been defeated.

  Chapter 2

  That day turned out to be one of the best; I had never felt so alive. Zack spent hours wowing both Taylor and me with stories of his life as a SEAL, those many times of conquer and defeat he’d had over the last three years. He told us about BUD/S training and the many tasks he had to complete in order to be where he was now.

  I knew messing with an older guy there would be expectations, but I didn’t let it stop me. I wanted everything he was willing to give, even if it was just for one night. I actually found myself hoping for it. I know, needy, right? But I didn’t care, not tonight anyway.

  The lies on my part came easy. And with each one, I found myself regretting them the moment they spilled from my lips. But I craved his attention, and I knew without those lies, I may not get this time with him.

  It was almost as if lying was an instinct of mine, like I was branded with that ability from birth. Lying was something that had always been a part of my life, a part that sometimes came so easily it was frightening.

  “I had fun with you today,” Zack said as he walked by my side. We were just along the water’s edge as the waves washed over our feet. Taking my hand in his he pulled me closer, pinning mine behind my back, our bodies touching, skin to skin. “It’s too bad you have to go back to college in a few days. I’d love to spend more time with you.”

  I looked up at him and smiled. “I’d love that too, but classes start bright and early Monday morning.” So it wasn’t a complete lie, but it was close enough. I’d led him to believe I was a twenty-year-old college student.

  I knew if I’d said I was just shy of eighteen, this moment, the entire day with him, would come to an abrupt end.

  “Who says this has to end here?” he asked. Panic set in for just a moment before he continued. “We can keep in touch right? Phone calls, letters, and see where it all leads.”

  Maybe I should have told him right then that I was still in high school. But instead I nodded as he closed the distance between us.

  The moment our lips touched, I melted against him. His other han
d wrapped around the back of my neck, holding me in place. Zack’s tongue grazed my lips, asking for permission I instantly granted.

  I was on the verge of mauling him, he felt so good.

  A moan escaped me, which in turn caused him to groan. He bit gently on my lower lip as he tugged with his teeth.

  “I think I better walk you home.” His voice had a husky rasp I hadn’t noticed before. The idea of having an effect on him excited me. I was not a virgin, but the ten minutes it took to lose that status was nothing compared to the excitement I felt now.

  Zack was not a boy; he was a man.

  “I don’t want to go back,” I whispered as I rose up and kissed him once again, taking control without hesitation. I should have felt embarrassed about the way I was rubbing up on him, but I didn’t. Instead I felt exhilarated and desirable.

  “Are you sure about this?” he asked.

  “Definitely sure,” I replied.

  He stared at me for a moment as if giving me one last chance to change my mind, yet I refused to stop this. I wanted it.

  He took my hand in his and led me to the house where he was staying. Not once did I feel nervous, only excited.

  He was so gentle and attentive. It was almost magical. Being young and inexperienced, I knew I was playing out a fantasy in my head, but I didn’t care. I wanted this night to remember during all the times at home when I felt like I was nothing.

  I looked up at him as he hovered above. The way he looked at me made me feel things I had never felt before. He wanted me; I could see it in his eyes.

  Zack and I had spent hours together just talking and kissing, and I wanted more. I wanted it all. Our time together was something I knew I would never forget. He held me close afterward, and kissed me softly as I fell asleep with my head on his chest and a lump in my throat.

  I didn’t want to leave him. I didn’t want to go back to the life I had in Illinois. I wanted to live in this little bubble we had created and never look back.