Jackson's Destiny (Sawyer Brothers #2) Page 5
Making Bailey see that we belonged together was the next obstacle. But I wasn’t worried; I knew she felt the connection between us too.
When Ryan slipped out the back door and walked toward me, I could feel the interrogation approaching.
“So.” He leaned back against the deck railing and crossed his ankles. “What’s going on with you and Blondie? Mom said you two visited today.”
I nodded as I laid the steaks on the grill. “Yeah, we stopped by. You should have seen Aunt Jeannie when I told them Bailey liked being tied up. She looked like she swallowed her damn tongue.” I chuckled and so did Ryan. “Ma laughed, though, and that was the goal.”
“Aunt Jeannie is going back home next week,” Ryan said. “It’s gonna be hard on Mom once she’s in that house alone again.”
My stomach tightened at his words. That horrible empty feeling hit me there every time I walked into my parents’ home. I couldn’t imagine what Mom felt every night when she lay in bed without him beside her.
“We’ll have to make sure at least one of us visits her every day so she doesn’t have the time to sink into the darkness,” I said. “Yeah, she’ll feel sad, and we can’t stop that, but we just need to make sure she knows we’re all here for her whenever she needs us, no matter when or how.”
Ryan nodded in agreement as he stared off into the distance with a desolate look on his face. I knew instantly he was thinking of his late wife, Claire. Those first few years after her death were dark for him, but his world began to lighten once again when he found Amber.
“She’ll get through it,” Ryan whispered. He cleared his throat before tipping back his beer bottle and taking a long pull. He then lowered the bottle and crossed his arms over his chest as our stares connected once more. “We’ll all get through it—together.”
I nodded in agreement as I shifted my gaze toward the windows that lined the back of my house. Bailey stood near the kitchen counter, smiling and laughing with Amber, who was standing across from her. That smile made me feel a little better about the conversation my brother and I just shared.
We would all get through this together.
Chapter Eleven
Bailey
The impending conversation with Amber was making me feel sick to my stomach. Dinner was amazing, but I could barely eat a thing as we sat around the table, laughing at Jackson and Ryan’s banter. When we were done, Amber and I volunteered to clean up while the guys rode up to their mom’s place to check on her and their aunt and to give us some time alone.
The moment the door shut behind them, my heart began to race. I had never in my life been afraid to tell Amber anything, except this. How did you tell your best friend that her mother was a conniving whore?
“Bailey, I’m panicking a little,” Amber said as she stood at my side. Even though Jackson had a fancy dishwasher, I was washing the dishes by hand and giving them to her to rinse. It was a way to keep my hands busy, and in that moment I needed something to calm me down.
“Please, just tell me,” Amber pleaded.
My eyes moistened, and I swallowed to keep my throat from constricting. “You have to promise me that no matter what, we’ll be okay,” I said, my voice vibrating with emotion. “I mean, after I say what I need to, it won’t change us and who we are together.”
“Nothing could change that.” She nudged me with her hip. “Well, unless you went after Ryan.” I looked over at her and caught her knowing smile. She knew that would never happen.
“I know it’s something to do with my mom, Bay. And I’m not dumb enough to believe that she’s innocent here. She has a long list of people she has hurt, and I know you’re on it. I don’t trust her enough to tell me the truth, so I just need you to explain it to me. Whatever it is, we’ll handle it together, you and me.”
I lowered the dish into the sink and dried my hands on a dish towel. “Let’s go sit down in the living room.” I turned in that direction, and she followed me.
After we were tucked side by side on the couch, I looked into her warm eyes. Amber has always been so supportive of me. Throughout my life, she has never judged me or made me feel as if my opinion was any less important than her own. A calmness settled in over me as I realized that no matter what, Amber and I would be okay.
“You know why my mom and dad got divorced. I mean, yeah, they had problems that started after Gabe’s death. But the last straw was when my dad cheated.”
She nodded. She knew that much, though she had no idea it was her mother that shared his bed.
Her parents were already separated at the time, and Amber’s dad was off doing God knows what. She spent years pretty much raising herself while her mom went after the next man that would fund her expensive tastes. It was hard to keep up with Carla and her newest conquests.
Taking in one last deep breath, I took the plunge. “The part I left out was who he cheated with, on more than one occasion.”
Her eyes crinkled. “It was my mother, wasn’t it?”
I nodded, and the tears I was trying to hold back began to fall. Amber leaned forward and took me into a reassuring hug.
“This changes nothing between us. Sisters by choice, always,” she whispered, and I nodded. “I already told Carla she had to find another place to stay.” I lifted my head and she shrugged. “I knew you being upset had something to do with her, so I knew it was time. She wasn’t supposed to stay, anyway. This was only temporary. If I didn’t force her out, she would never leave.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
She tugged on a lock of my hair that had fallen over my shoulder. “You have nothing to be sorry about. It isn’t our fault our parents are pathetic. I just wish you had told me sooner.”
“I know.” My heart felt like it seized when I heard the front door open and the guys walked in. They looked at us for a second, huddled on the couch with tearstained cheeks, before Jackson rushed to me. He took us all by surprise when he knelt before me and cupped my face in his hands.
“You okay, sweetheart?” he asked, and that unsettled feeling in my stomach only grew stronger. I nodded because I was still slightly stunned from his reaction. He looked over at Amber, and her expression showed equal shock.
“You sure, darlin’?” he asked me.
“Yeah,” I replied. “I’m good.” I lifted my hands and placed them on top of his. “We’re good, we talked.”
He nodded and lowered his hands to rest on my thighs, taking mine with them.
“Thank you for being here for her,” Amber told Jackson.
His gaze still locked on mine, he gently nodded. “No need to thank me. I’ll always be here for her.” Though he was speaking to her, his eyes expressed the intensity of his comment to me.
I wasn’t sure when Jackson developed this unexplainable protective nature toward me, but it was so strong you could almost feel its presence. He watched me like a hawk, took every chance he could to hide me from anything harmful, and was intent on putting my happiness first. And when I wasn’t happy, he didn’t hide the fact that my sadness did not sit well with him.
A girl could get used to attention like this. It was both scary and welcome, and I had lacked it for far too long. The thought of losing the comfort he brought me made my stomach ache.
Chapter Twelve
Jackson
I stood in the doorway with Bailey tucked securely at my side. Though we hadn’t discussed it yet, I had no intentions of allowing her to leave. Ryan and Amber lingered as if they were waiting for Bailey to go with them, so I took it upon myself to let them know what was going on.
“She’s staying,” I said, looking at my brother. He smiled before turning his gaze to Amber, who was staring directly at Bailey. I knew she was looking for a sign that Bailey disagreed, but I never let it happen. I tightened my arm over Bailey’s shoulders, and she immediately brought her hand to my stomach. When I looked over at her, her big blue eyes were looking up at me.
“You’re staying with me,” I said.
I only shook my head.
“Jackson,” she said, her tone almost questioning.
“I want you here. I like having you here,” I explained. “I think we may have a few things of our own to talk about too.”
Her eyebrow arched in question, and I looked back toward my brother and his fiancée. “She’s staying with me tonight.”
Ryan nodded in agreement, and Amber stepped forward to give Bailey a hug. As she did, she turned her head toward me and narrowed her eyes. “Don’t hurt her,” she whispered.
“Not a chance,” I replied.
As if that was all she needed to hear, Amber moved out of the hug and took a step backward toward Ryan. He wrapped her hand in his and led her to his truck.
Bailey and I watched as they backed down the driveway and turned onto the road. Eventually, their taillights faded into the darkness.
“What is it we need to talk about?” she asked.
“Everything.” I let go of her shoulders and rounded on her, bringing my body to stand tall in front of hers. I placed my hands on her hips and stared down at her curious expression. “You look less stressed,” I said. “Maybe a little more relaxed than you were earlier tonight.”
“Yeah.” A smile pulled at the corner of her lips. “It helped talking to Am. It went much better than I thought. I guess I was just always worried that what happened between our parents would eventually come between us. Knowing that it won’t is a huge relief.”
I nodded as I stepped in just a little closer, and her breasts pressed firmly against my chest. I slid my hands around her waist and pulled her even nearer.
“Amber had already told Carla she needed to find someplace else to stay. So it looks like I can go home.”
The thought of Bailey leaving was something I didn’t want. Having her here with me was comforting. “There’s no rush,” I said. “You can stay here as long as you want. I kinda like having you around.”
“You do?”
“It’s sorta part of what I wanted to talk to you about,” I explained. She looked up at me, silently scanning my expression. “You know how for months you’ve avoided me? Pretending not to notice when I flirt or stare?”
Her cheeks reddened as she averted her eyes to my chest, hiding her embarrassment.
“Eyes, baby,” I demanded.
Her gaze shifted back to mine almost immediately.
“All that avoiding, all those games, they stop now,” I said. “I’m done waiting for you to catch up.” She arched an eyebrow, and I chuckled. “I want you, Bailey. I have for too long. I screwed up, because in the beginning I was the one that played games. But it stops now. We both feel this connection, so don’t try to pretend you don’t.”
“I—”
I nodded and she stopped abruptly. “It happened at different times, I know, but we both have unsettled shit now, and it has a way of keeping you from moving forward. Getting over my loss hasn’t been an easy road, and I know I have a hell of a lot more healing to do, but you help me heal. Just having you close makes me feel as if everything in my life isn’t completely fucked up.”
I lifted my hands to her cheeks and held her face, assuring she looked me directly in the eyes. I needed more than anything else for her to understand that what I was about to say was the complete truth. “I want you in my life, every day, and not just as my friend. I want an us.”
She blinked and I waited. “Why?”
I brought my face just a few inches closer to hers. “Because there is so much more to you than I gave you credit for. You are beautiful,” I whispered and placed my lips against hers. I pulled back slowly, then rested my forehead against hers. “And you light up my world, Bay.”
She wrapped her arms around my neck and climbed up my body. I gripped the backs of her thighs and lifted her to wrap her legs around my waist. We stood in the open doorway of my house, staring at one another. Her weaving her hands through my hair and me gripping her ass, holding her in place.
“You do sweet pretty well, Jackson Sawyer,” she whispered, and her eyes glistened. “I kinda like your mushy side.”
I chuckled, and her smile lit up her face. “Only for you, sweetheart.” If a few sweet words lit her up the way she was right now, hell, I would do my damnedest to give her a little sweet each day.
***
The sound of the rain hitting the window just to the left of the couch woke me. Bailey and I had settled in together for a movie, and I hadn’t meant to fall asleep. I immediately noticed the absence of her body against mine as I sat up and began scanning the living room. When I found no signs of her, I stood up and checked room after room, panic rushing through me when I couldn’t find her. As I walked back out to the living room, I gripped the back of my neck in frustration. Had my sweet been too much? I wasn’t used to acting that way, but damn if Bailey didn’t make that shit just fall from my lips without even a second thought.
The light from the front porch caught my eye, and I rushed toward the door, which wasn’t locked when I twisted the knob. The moment the door came open, I stood there, frozen at the sight before me.
Bailey was standing less than five feet from the front steps with her head tipped upward and her eyes closed as the rain pelted her skin. She was soaked, and her hair stuck to her face, though the chill of the late spring morning didn’t appear to bother her.
Alarmed, I was about to run to her when she turned to face me and I saw the smile that graced her lips. “I’ve always wanted to do this.” She shrugged before laughing, as if standing in the pouring rain was some great adventure.
I sauntered down the front steps, and the rain began to soak my own clothes. As I walked up to her, she tilted her neck back, looking up at me. “I know it sounds crazy, but I feel so free after talking to Amber that now just seemed like the perfect time to play in the rain.”
I grazed her cheek with my thumb as I pushed her wet hair from her face. “You should have woken me up. I’d play in the rain with you, no questions, darlin’.”
“Stop with the sweet.” She grinned. “Where is the controlling Jackson I know and lo—” She closed her mouth quickly and averted her eyes.
My heart raced with the idea of what she was about to say, but I pushed it aside. “You don’t like my sweet side?”
“Oh I do,” she assured me. “But right now, I think I need something else.” Her voice was a notch lower than usual—soft, alluring, and slightly suggestive.
I hooked a finger into the collar of her shirt and tugged her toward me. “Controlling and demanding it is, then,” I told her as I lowered my other hand to her shirt and slowly lifted the fabric to expose her stomach. The hitch in her breathing made me smirk. Bailey pulled her lower lip between her teeth as she lifted her gaze once more to meet mine.
“Is this what you want, Bay?” I asked. She nodded without releasing her lip. “You want me to make you mine?” Another nod, yet still no words. The rain had slowed, but was still falling hard enough to bead on and roll over her cheeks and neck. “Tell me, baby, I need to hear it,” I pressed. “I need the words, darlin’.”
“Yes,” she whimpered.
“Yes, what?”
“I want this. I want you. I want to be yours, Jackson.”
I tried not to grin, but her saying that felt like the greatest gift I had received in a long time. Sliding my palms over her wet skin, I continued to lift her shirt up and over her head. It made a slapping sound as I dropped it to the sidewalk.
“You are mine,” I assured her before lowering my lips to hers.
Those words set yet another thrill through her as she fisted her hands in my t-shirt before she began to lift upward. I broke our kiss just long enough to help her and threw it down to join hers at our feet.
As the rain picked up again, we both went for one another’s pants, and I smiled against her lips at the frenzied movements of our hands. When she had my jeans undone, she didn’t wait before wrapping her hand around my coc
k. I groaned as she began gliding her hand up and down.
“Let’s take this inside,” I growled.
Once again, Bailey attached herself to me by wrapping her arms around my neck. I lifted her and held her close with a hand on each firm cheek of her perfect ass, then spun around and stalked toward my front door, leaving behind the pile of our very wet clothes.
After securing her against the now-closed front door long enough to lock it, I hurried toward my bedroom with her still in my arms. As I rounded the corner and the bed came into view, I lowered her to the mattress as I kissed her again.
With her ankles hooked at the small of my back, Bailey had a strong grip around my waist. Excitement raced through me, making my body shake with adrenaline. I had waited for this moment, wanted it for so long, and now it was happening. I was claiming my girl, and I had every intention of making it one of the greatest moments of our lives for both of us.
Chapter Thirteen
Bailey
The moment Jackson placed me on his bed, my mind came to a halt and all my thoughts faded away. I was always painfully aware of the attraction that pooled in my stomach every single time he was near me, yet it was intensified to the highest extreme now as he hovered over me. I knew then I had no hope of ever escaping my need for his touch. I craved it, and without it, I knew I would starve.
The look is his eyes as he scanned my body told me he felt the same way.
“Kiss me,” I whispered, because I felt like I would explode if he didn’t give me something soon. As he lowered his body to mine, the warmness of his chest against mine ignited my desire for him.
“I have every intention of kissing you, Bailey,” he cooed, leaning in. As he ran his tongue over my neck, I arched my back, pressing my body even closer to his. He grazed my ear with his lips. “And licking you—” A whimper escaped me. “—everywhere.” He thrust his hips forward, rubbing his hardness against me.